is the policy to endure wrongs for the sake of Christ, forgiving that others might discover through us the grace of God in forgiving the sinner."
Helping Strategy
1. Reassure the inquirer that God is mindful of us in every situation. His Word has something to say about enemies.
2. Ask if he or she has ever received Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. If not, share "Steps to Peace with God," page 11.
3. If the inquirer is a Christian, encourage a renewal of commitment to Christ. Use "Restoration," page 17, emphasizing 1 John 1:9 and Romans 12:1. A new or renewed relationship with Christ should help to bring a new perspective to feelings about enemies.
4. Ask the following questions, which may open some windows of understanding about reconciliation. Make an effort to understand the situation. Request information about the people and problems involved:
A. What caused the break in the relationship?
B. Has the inquirer contributed to the problem?
C. As far as he or she can determine, what is the attitude of the other
person? Is the inquirer being totally honest in trying to evaluate the situation?
D. Ask how he or she feels about the "enemy": resentful? embittered?
harboring ill will?
E. Emphasize that he or she has the obligation to forgive, with all that
this implies. He or she is to take the first step toward reconciliation. The mature Christian will always assume the responsibility for being a peacemaker. Highlight the attitude of Christ, who never demanded His "rights." Though He was reviled and spat upon, He didn't retaliate.
F. Stress that it is in the inquirer's best interest to clear up the situation
as early as possible: "Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court . . . or he may hand you over to the judge . . . and you may be thrown into prison. . . . You will not get out until you have paid the last penny" (Matthew 5:25–26, NIV).
G. Any approach to reconciliation must be made with humility,
remembering that none of us is without sin: "A soft answer turns away wrath" (Proverbs 15:1). "Speaking the truth in love" (Ephesians 4:15).